Sharks in the Water…”OK”
A colleague at work spent her holidays in Florida, kayaking on Tampa Bay and fishing. She caught a crab and several fish that couldn’t be eaten. Her friend caught a three foot shark, which she emphatically explained, she would not let him bring into the kayak. I know how she felt.
On one of my first trips to the Maldives, before I actually had a scuba diving license, I went with a friend on a resort dive. That means that for a fairly reasonable fee you get basic lessons; how to breathe air through your regulator, how to achieve buoyancy, how to clear your mask and relieve pressure in your ears, and most importantly, how to signal the dive master that you were “OK.” We practiced it several times underwater. thumb to forefinger…”OK.” Smiling around our regulators…”OK!” All together now, “OK!”
I have to admit up front that I was somewhat reluctant to go diving in waters where I believed, however naively, that there were sharks. But our dive master, a lovely German woman (we’ll call her Helga) assured me that the one place we would actually dive that day was absolutely shark-free. Isn’t that the scene in the movie where you know that someone is going to die?
My friend Bob and I completed our basic training in waist deep water, had a short break and returned for our actual dive in deeper water. I was excited, but still nervous about the possibility of sharks. We stopped at the dive room to get our equipment and were completely outfitted in rental wet suits, rental tanks, rental weights, rental masks. For a small extra fee you even could rent a waterproof camera, which I did, making me fully prepared to capture on film everything that my eyes might not be able to see clearly. Since I wear glasses, and didn’t have a prescription mask, vision would be a problem beyond large shapes. (cue music from JAWS, heard faintly in the background). Let me be clear here. My vision is about 20/500 so something has to be pretty big for me to see it without glasses, ok?
We followed Helga out through shallow water to a break in the reef and onto the shelf on the edge of the island where the light streamed down on thousands of tropical fish. I couldn’t really see individual fish mind you, but I could discern schools of fish and the occasional bright blue or bright yellow of the larger tropical fish. The water in the Maldives is crystal clear and you can see much farther in the water than you would ever believe possible. We were very fortunate that day to see giant clams and an enormous sea turtle, bright coral along the reef, and a multitude of eels, rays and parrot fish. I was amazed and I will admit, hooked. It was beautiful.
I was relieved to find there were no sharks…except the one. (turn up the JAWS music please. A little louder now). A little three or four footer just over there, watching me and showing it’s teeth. Sharp teeth just over there. JUST OVER THERE! I frantically signaled to Bob to look where I was pointing and tried to get the dive master’s attention. They both made the “OK” sign. “HLLLLLGGGGAAA!” I screamed around the regulator in my mouth, “SSSSHARRRRRRGGG!!” It was definitely NOT “OK.” They both smiled at me inanely and made the two handed, double thumbs to forefingers “OK!” “OK!!” I was aghast. I swam around behind them. If they wanted to ignore the fact that there was a shark in the water, fine. I didn’t have to be a faster swimmer than the shark…just a faster swimmer than Bob and Helga.
Once I got behind Bob though, I noticed that the shark was gone. Perhaps they just hadn’t seen it. It was only four feet long I suppose, and kind of whitish anyway. They probably just didn’t see it. But I saw it, and I could barely see anything. I spent the rest of the dive reminding myself that I was an army officer, a representative of the finest military in the world. It was not seemly for me to be worried about a little shark in the water. Right? I also spent the time watching out for the shark.
We returned to shore and as soon as I came up I began to berate Bob for not noticing the shark. “What shark?” he asked. “The one in the water!” I said, exasperated. “Well did you get a picture?” he asked. I looked down at the $12.00 rental camera strapped around my wrist. I looked back at a grinning Bob. “There wasn’t time,” I replied. “Too bad,” Bob said knowingly. I just glared. “Are you OK?” he asked. “OK” I signed. We went to lunch.
Later that day we merrily climbed on board the resort boat, with some other divers who had no need for an escort, and dropped them off in very deep water, before we came a bit back to shore near a completely different part of the reef where, Helga assured us, there was absolutely no chance at all, that we would see a shark. (LOUD JAWS music, heavy foreshadowing, blood draining from my face).
W e went off the boat, into the water and I was last in. Bob and Helga were already swimming away from the boat when I saw it. I mean, I wasn’t even ten feet below the surface yet and there it was, a five foot long shark! Helga and Bob were still swimming away from me so I quickly snapped a picture and tried to catch up. She was happily pointing things out to Bob, a splotch of blue something here, a big patch of greenish something else over there, some red something or other, maybe coral, maybe fish, who knows, I couldn’t really see small objects after all. Every time I turned around however, the shark was still there, about fifteen feet away.
I finally caught up to the happy couple, idly lolling about in the water, gently floating at ten meters depth, completely unaware that we were all about to be ripped to shreds. I got Helgas attention and pointed back at the shark. She and Bob looked back, as did I, and it was still there. On the one hand it proved I wasn’t crazy, on the other hand, it meant that there really was a shark just moments away from ripping us apart. The only thing is, now that it was closer, it wasn’t five feet long. It was more like eight feet long, maybe even ten feet long.
If you can laugh around a regulator, Helga did. Then Bob did. Then they both gave me the, you guessed it, “OK” gesture. I couldn’t believe it! I pointed again, thinking perhaps they hadn’t seen it and Bob began to swim towards it. “NO!” I thought, you have a family to think about. Bob gestured that I should take pictures, so I did. The whole roll, except for the few that Bob took with the shark swimming behind me. Vindicated that I had in fact seen a shark, but terrified that it was in fact still swimming around us, I continued to swim with Bob and the apparently mindless Helga as we finished our dive. They saw turtles, fish, kelp, coral, eels, clams, shells, rocks and other divers. I saw the shark…continuously. And a little bit of water. Between me and the shark. Yup. Clearly a ten footer. Maybe longer. With razor sharp teeth. (JAWS theme on full volume then fade to black).
When the dive was over, Bob and Helga gave me quite a hard time. “That was just a baby!” “It couldn’t have been more than four feet long.” “It was probably vegetarian.” “There was nothing to worry about.” I suffered in silence…I endured their insults…I had film this time. “Just wait til I get this developed,” I told Bob. “OK” he signed.
There are times in our lives that we would like to forget. Times that must not have happened the way we recall. I’ve never been drunk in my life, so I don’t really have many times like that, except perhaps for this one. Several weeks later I got the film back and discovered that I had a picture of Bob, a couple of pictures of me, and twenty-one pictures of blue water. The pictures were blue. As though there wasn’t even anything there. I mean, one or two of the pictures had a faint shape that might have been a three or four foot shark, but clearly not the one that I saw. The worst part of all was that I would have to show the pictures to Bob.
To this day, I swear the shark was, I don’t know…ten maybe twelve feet long. Bob claims it was just a little tiny thing, like the one in the picture. But you have to believe me, it REALLY was a big shark. OK? “OK!”
January 3rd, 2008 at 9:52 pm
OK!
January 14th, 2008 at 9:07 am
I’m not a D&D player, but I understand that at a recent D&D feast, a couple of counts were arguing about the size of four foot, vegetarian dragons. OK!